for my brother and childhood friends Basia, Arek and Mariusz
once again I’d like to see us kids chasing each other through the fields,
you waiting for me by the house. Our partings always ended
the same way: with silence that looked us in the eyes.
twenty-five years later, I spit blood into the tub
and wake someone up who might have stopped
loving me, when he saw how quickly life could
twenty-five years later, your children are born.
Me, I’ve nothing.
This is a poem about people who once were close to me, but whom I’ve been out of touch with for years. We were children together, and they have a special place in my memory. Entering into such friendships for life now seems impossible for me. Which of us is happy? Whose life has not worked out? One morning Basia, Arek, Mariusz and my brother came back to me intensely. In always, I wanted to tell them in what moment I found myself.
Translated by Karen Kovacik